Business Communication Requires Tact – A Story

I trust that my readers have been able to understand the concept of Emotional Intelligence through the stories I brought forward in my previous blogs. For a few weeks from now, I shall be focusing upon communication, the backbone of all successful relationships – be it personal or professional.

The focus of MMM Training Solutions has been to improve business communication in the workplace. There are many elements that, which when put together, constitute effective communication. I shall focus an important element today – tact and delivery. Let us now understand this concept with a story.

A long time ago, a Sultan summoned one of his wise men to ask how long he would live. “Your Excellency”, replied the wise man promptly, “you would live long enough to see all your sons and their children dead.” Upon hearing this, the Sultan flew into a fit of rage and ordered that this wise man be executed at once.

Some weeks later after this incident, the Sultan called upon another wise man of his province and asked him the same question. Now this man was really wise. After some thought he answered, “Your Excellency, I see that you shall be blessed with a successful life, wherein you will live so long that you will outlive your loved ones.” The Sultan was delighted and rewarded the wise man with gold and silver.

What is the difference in the way both these wise men communicated to the Sultan? Both of them perhaps said the truth, but there was a stark difference in the results. The difference lies in tact and delivery of content – the first wise man failed in this aspect, while the second wise man succeeded.

One of the most important lessons in business communication is that you should deliver your content after a lot of careful consideration and thought. A business environment is very sensitive and the method in which you communicate holds a critical key to your growth and success.

Four things cannot come back – the spoken word, the spent arrow, the past life and the neglected opportunity.
~An Ancient Proverb

Leadership – Sticking To Your Guns

Walt Disney needs no introduction. The famous founder of Mickey Mouse and co-founder of Walt Disney Productions was an influential thinker during his time. As a young boy, he developed a love and passion for drawing. The journey never stopped even after the setting up of the Walt Disney amusement park, where all his characters still enchant audience – young and old alike – even to this day.

Walt Disney was a man with high Emotional Intelligence – his strong leadership qualities were very pragmatic because of his understanding of the people around him. He believed that you should never stop dreaming, as it leads to the formation of new ideas and gives you a sense of purpose and direction. Though he suffered huge setbacks in his life, he had the courage to keep going on.

His story of struggle and success teaches us an important leadership lesson – leaders need to have the tenacity to chase a dream or goal. This is what will make a true leader stand apart. This person should be the motivating factor to urge his team on towards the finishing line. The leader should encourage others to make their dreams a reality.

“The key to happiness is having dreams. The key to success is making your dreams come true.” ~Anonymous

Living With Emotional Intelligence – Learning From The Mosquito

An important aspect of Emotional Intelligence is optimism. Here is an amusing story based upon positive thinking that I recently heard. I’m sure that it will help us understand that life becomes more beautiful and exciting when perceived from an optimistic perspective.

This is a story of a mosquito family. Like any other mosquito child of his age, the little mosquito of this particular story had to go to mosquito school. This was where he would learn how to fly and feed himself from the best available resource available to mosquito-kind – the humans.

After its graduation, the little mosquito left home on its first assignment. Its parents were excited and worried at the same time – their little one had grown up, and was about to take its first flight into the big world. The little mosquito calmed them saying that he would definitely return and share stories of his taste of success.

Time passed by. The little mosquito was gone for a while now, and his parents were beginning to get nervous. Just when they thought that all hope was lost, in he flew. He looked very happy, and was jubilantly smiling. His proud and relieved parents asked him, “How did you do it son? We’re so happy that the humans haven’t swatted you!”

To this the little mosquito replied, “Swat me? No way! I think they somehow came to find out that it was my first assignment. They were so happy to see me that they encouraged me throughout – by clapping hands and cheering me on!”

This humorous story brings out an important facet of life through the perspective of the little mosquito. Life is what you make out of it – you can choose to be happy and enjoy the journey and the challenges it brings; or you can choose to be pessimistic and appear downtrodden in your own eyes – seeing every hurdle as a mountain in your path, and ultimately having nothing to look back and be proud of.

We should lead life in an emotionally intelligent way, and ensure that we have something to look back at and be happy that we have done something, rather than wonder why we had not done the right thing when it was demanded of us.

Emotional Intelligence – The Seed You Sow For A Fantastic Life

In this blog post, I would like to help readers understand an important aspect of Emotional Intelligence – life is what you think it to be. Read on…

On May 29th, 1953, Sir Edmund Hillary became the first man along with Sherpa Tenzing Norgay to climb Mount Everest, the highest mountain peak at 29,000 feet. In his book, High Adventure, Hillary mentions that he had to grow into this success: In 1952 he attempted to climb Mount Everest, but failed.

A few weeks later, a group in England asked him to address its members. Hillary walked on stage amidst thunderous applause. The audience was acknowledging an attempt at greatness, but Hillary saw himself as a failure.

He moved away from the microphone and walked to the edge of the platform. He made a fist and pointed at a picture of the Mount Everest and said in a loud voice, “Mount Everest, you beat me the first time, but I’ll beat you the next time because you’ve grown all you are going to grow… but I’m still growing!”

Such extreme achievements have a lot of physical, mental and emotional power involved. If Hillary would have given up, or relaxed after the first attempt, the world would not have known such a great mountaineer today; he is a man known for his sheer determination and grit – and I would like to see him as an individual who sowed the right seed that led to a great achievement.

This is an example of Emotional Intelligence that harbours many facets. Taking the right step is an important beginning that would chart out a better view of the challenges that you are faced with. So by thinking in the right way – optimistically – you pave the way for continued success in your life.

Emotional Intelligence – The Story Of Two Horses

Emotional Intelligence, today’s corporate buzzword, is a concept that is more concrete than abstract. When you open your eyes and start to think, there are a lot of instances, examples and anecdotes that will come to your mind with regards to it.
Here is an excerpt of a short story that I recently read that once again drives home the concept of Emotional Intelligence that is, or should be, at work in our life…

Just up the road from my home is a field, with two horses in it. From a distance, each horse looks like any other horse. But if you get a closer look you will notice something quite interesting…

One of the horses is blind.

His owner has chosen not to have him put down, but has made him a safe and comfortable barn to live in. If you stand nearby and listen, you will hear the sound of a bell. It comes from a smaller horse in the field. Attached to the horse’s halter is a small, copper-colored bell. It lets the blind friend know where the other horse is, so that he can follow.

As you stand and watch these two friends, you’ll see that the horse with the bell is always checking on the blind horse, and that the blind horse will listen for the bell and then slowly walk to where the other horse is, trusting he will not be led astray.

When the horse with the bell returns to the shelter of the barn each evening, he will stop occasionally to look back, making sure that the blind friend isn’t too far behind to hear the bell..

– Author Unknown

The display of empathy and inspiration is common amongst animals as it is in man. Think of your personal and professional life up to date: there are a lot of instances where you don the role of the blind horse and other times when you become the horse with the bell.

The blind horse signifies the times when we needed to be inspired and motivated, just so that we realize and are reminded of our infinite potential and strength. Other times, we become the horse with the bell – that is, the source of inspiration and motivation to guide others so that they can find their way through, and achieve what they are capable of.

In a nutshell, what more can Emotional Intelligence mean, when applied to our lives?

Empathy In Emotional Intelligence

Here is a touching story on Empathy in Emotional Intelligence. It is the story of a little boy who saw things in a perspective that was different from many other young children of his age.

A farmer once painted a sign board advertising that he had puppies to sell. As he was driving the last nail into the board on the edge of his fence, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down to see a little boy, his eyes wide with expectancy and excitement.

Mister,” he said, “I want to buy one of your puppies.”

“Well,” said the farmer, “these puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money.”

The boy looked down for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer. “I’ve got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?”

The farmer smiled. “Sure”, he said. And with that he let out a whistle, “Here, Dolly!” he called.

Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur. The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight.

As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse. Slowly another little ball appeared; this one was noticeably smaller. In a somewhat awkward manner the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up….

“I want that one,” the little boy said, pointing to the awkward puppy.

The farmer knelt down at the boy’s side and said, “Son, you don’t want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would.”

Upon hearing this, the little boy looked into the eyes of the farmer and stepped back from the fence. He reached down and began rolling up the sleeve of one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg that was attached to a specially made shoe. Looking back up at the farmer, he said, “You see sir, I don’t run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands him.”

This story of empathy, an important aspect of Emotional Intelligence, should set us thinking. The seemingly trivial act of the young boy was selfless and very understanding. If the story continued, it would have been on the lines of many happy days for the little boy and the puppy.

With a little bit of empathy, it is possible to relate to others, understand and help them out. This adds value to the meaning of life. We get so much in return, happiness being the greatest return.

Emotional Intelligence – Getting Into The Act

I was recently watching the Hollywood movie, Sister Act, (1992) starring Whoopi Goldberg. The movie is about how Deloris (played by Whoopi) impersonates a nun and unwillingly accepts the responsibility of managing the church choir – while she is in hiding under police protection. I would like to talk to you about a particular scene where I was reminded about Emotional Intelligence.

In the movie, Deloris is a lively pop singer. While she is there, she revamps the lifeless and archaic choir group and transforms them into passion-filled, lively singers who effortlessly captivate the audience. Deloris was fully aware that this would not garner the approval of Mother Superior but she did it anyway as she believed, with certainty, that this would be beneficial both for the audience as well as the singers. At the first performance, the Archbishop was overwhelmed by the passion of the singers and the involvement of the audience. Much to everyone’s surprise, the Archbishop praises Deloris for her efforts to bring change and depth into choir worship. Deloris, though taken aback, humbly tells the Archbishop that this whole effort for change was instigated by Mother Superior.

This may sound trivial, but this is a transformational and touching moment in the film. Deloris demonstrated that if we have passion for whatever we do then we will be able handle people and situations effectively. She wisely handled others’ emotions in a way that everyone basked in the glory of success in the end, thereby bringing happiness into the picture.

This is, essentially, what the core foundation of Emotional Intelligence lies upon – the ability to live in the moment. It is the sustained ability to always get into the act, and do what is required to augment group success and individual happiness.

Increasing Emotional Intelligence To Get The Best Out Of Life

Here is a story that helps to demonstrate the concept of Emotional Intelligence:

There was once a dog that unknowingly entered into a room full of mirrors. Since it did not know that it was looking at its own reflection, it started to bark loudly, running from one mirror to another. It was really angry because it thought that there were other dogs challenging him into a fight. The dog relentlessly kept barking. Eventually it died of exhaustion, trying to fight its mirrored ‘enemies’.

What is the learning point in this story?

What could the dog have done to gain from the situation that he was faced with?
If only the dog had wagged his tail once, he would have had all of ‘the others’ wagging their tails in friendship. This sums up emotional intelligence skills in many ways.
If the dog had practiced self regulation – self restraint and self control – it would have been able to think about its situation and acted appropriately.
If the dog was more self-aware, it would have understood that it can make friends with ‘the other dogs’, rather than get aggressive and make foes.
If the dog was positively motivated, it would have been optimistic about its challenge – i.e., ‘the other dogs’ – and hence be driven to make friends by choosing the right goal.
If the dog was empathetic, it would have been able to see ‘the other dogs’ point of view: that the ‘other dogs’ might have been interested in making friends with it.

In many ways, life is like an echo – we get back whatever we put out. So let us make it a point to improve our emotional intelligence skills, so that we can put out optimism and get back the same multifold. In this way, we can get the most out of life and happiness increases, thereby improving quality of life.

Emotional Intelligence – The Ingredient For Great Leadership

In my previous blogs, I briefly introduced emotional intelligence and its importance in today’s world. This week I would like to quote a few examples from history to prove that you too can make it to the heights of achievement by emphasizing on emotional intelligence in every aspect of your life.

Firstly, let us take the instance of the 40th President of the United States, Ronald Reagan. He is undoubtedly one of the most charismatic leaders that the world has seen. He became a model for the Republicans not only because he was able to strike a chord with them, but also because he understood them and their emotions aptly. Ronald Reagan had a very high emotional intelligence, as did many other great leaders of his nation. He knew his strengths, had the ability to empathize, inspire and motivate and was a social favorite amongst the majority of his countrymen.

Sardar Vallabhai Patel, India’s ‘Man of Steel’ was another amazing leader in the true sense. He played a crucial role in the country’s struggle for independence and guided its integration into an integrated and united nation. He was a man of remarkable foresight and strong emotional intelligence. His faithful allegiance to Gandhi saw him make clear and well thought decisions in order that India may be benefited. History is filled with literature of this wise man, who held the mantle from the back seat and ensured that the country reaped the benefits.

To conclude this blog, I would like to emphasize that each one of us can work on our emotional intelligence by introspection and consciously making the right choice when it comes to displaying our emotions. Let me end with a quote,

“Man’s main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is. The most important product of his effort is his own personality.” ~ Erich Fromm (German social psychologist)